Promises Made, Promises Forgotten
by WNC Caroline
Summary: Sully makes a mistake that could be fatal. Can he come to terms with what he has done or will it be too late? Promises Made, Promises Forgotten is an AU story based upon "Another Woman" from DQMW's second season. This is my first fan fiction of any type. I welcome your comments, suggestions, and reviews. Just please be kind to the new kid on the block! Thanks for reading...enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

**Promises Made, Promises Forgotten**

_**The characters of Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman are owned by The Sullivan Company, A&E, and CBS. Hopefully, they won't mind if I borrow them for a short time. I promise they will be returned in good condition and will always be treated with love and respect while in my care!**_

**CHAPTER 1**

The sun had already set behind the western ridge as the crickets and frogs trilled their nightly chorus down by the creek. Dr. Mike, who huddled on the front stoop of the homestead, did not seem to hear nature's sweet serenade. Unfortunately, the sounds did not comfort her nor did the light woolen shawl wrapped tightly around her small, slumped shoulders. Her confusing feelings for Sully seemed to weigh her down, and as she sat in the dark she could feel the chill of the night air as it permeated her wrap and lightweight cotton dress. Tonight her thoughts were on what had happened at church that morning and on what was happening inside the small cabin rather than on the peaceful Colorado night.

When she left the cabin earlier to go check on the water buckets for Bear and Flash in the barn, Sully had not even glanced up from his seat on the floor next to Catherine, and any hopes of sharing a private moment with him away from the others were soon dashed. Since the beautiful blonde captive had taken up residence with Dr. Mike and the children two days prior, Sully had rapidly become distant from the family. Now, whispered conversations between him and Catherine often went late into the night. Brian had been the first to notice the change in Sully and Dr. Mike's behavior. Even Colleen seemed on edge during supper. Matthew, who was always so focused on his engagement with Ingrid, seemed oblivious to the strained undertones.

Suddenly a light came from the doorway as it opened, and Dr. Mike heard laughter from inside the cabin.

"Whatcha doin', Ma?" Brian asked while standing behind her.

"I just checked on the horses and was enjoying the evening, Brian."

"Well, I beat Matthew at checkers again, and he won't play no more. Will you play with me?"

"Not tonight, sweetheart. Perhaps you can get Sully to play."

"Sully don't wanna be bothered with me right now. He's too busy talkin' to Catherine again. They're goin' to the reservation tomorrow, and she's all excited about meetin' Cloud Dancing and Snowbird. Besides that, I can always beat you!"

Matthew came through the door and heard the tail end of Brian's boasting and started laughing. "Little brother, you ain't gonna get anybody to play against you if you keep braggin' like that. As he strolled toward the barn, he turned to Dr. Mike and wished her a good night.

"I'm gonna hit the hay. I promised Miss Olive's foreman I'd be at the ranch by sunup tomorrow."

Dr. Mike lifted her down-bent head and smiled at the boys. "Brian. You and Colleen need to get to bed as well. You've got school tomorrow."

Brian rolled his eyes and shuffled back toward the open doorway. As he went back into the cabin, Sully and Catherine could still be heard whispering as they sat cross-legged by the warmth of the fire. Neither seemed to pay attention to the bantering between siblings.

Just as he started to head to the side-door entrance to the barn, Dr. Mike called out, "Oh, Matthew? Can you take Brian and Colleen to school on Tuesday for me? I need to ride out to the Galloway's and change Mrs. Galloway's dressing."

Sully looked up from his seat by the fireplace and for the first time that evening seemed to be paying attention to what was being said by the others outside the doorway of the small cabin. "Maybe you oughta wait until Catherine and I get back from the reservation and let me go with you. I can take ya on Wednesday."

Startled he had noticed or even heard her conversation with Matthew, Dr. Mike turned and said, "Not that I don't enjoy your company but, why do you need to go with me? I've been to the Galloway's many times. Besides, I hate to wait too long lest Mrs. Galloway should develop an infection in her incision."

"The creek road to their homestead washed out about a week ago, and you'll hafta take the path through the creek in the gorge. That way catches the edge of old man Hawkins' claim, and I hear he's been shootin' at anything that gets near his lean-to. We'll be back late Tuesday, an' you and me can go early Wednesday morning. Surely, one day won't make a difference, Dr. Mike."

This was the most he had said to her all evening.

Surprised that he was even offering to spend the morning with her and without Catherine's presence, she responded, "Well, okay, if you're sure, but I have a patient coming in at three o'clock on Wednesday. Do you think we can be back by then?"

"Sure. If we get away from here by daybreak and you don't dawdle any." He looked at Catherine and grinned. Her blue eyes sparkled, and she smiled as if she and Sully were sharing some secret joke.

"I do not dawdle, Mr. Sully!" Dr. Mike retorted. "I suppose Wednesday will be fine after all."

Matthew, who had been listening to the conversation, turned from the doorway, and as he headed to the barn said, "Then it's settled. I'll take Brian and Colleen on Wednesday then."

"Thank you, Matthew," she agreed in a soft voice. "Goodnight."

* * *

As Matthew closed the barn door, Dr. Mike stood and walked slowly into the cabin. Sully and Catherine continued to speak in whispers by the fire. Occasionally, a Cheyenne word or phrase would be exchanged by the twosome, and she felt even more left out, as her knowledge of Cheyenne was limited to the few phrases Sully and Snowbird had taught her. Off in the side alcove, Colleen and Brian could be heard giggling as they prepared for bed.

She blew out the candles on the table and then turned toward the couple quietly talking by the fire. "Sully?" She murmured and then repeated his name in a louder tone when she got no response. "Sully?"

Finally startled by her sharp tone, he looked up and away from Catherine. "Uh, I'm sorry. What, Dr. Mike?"

"Are you staying again tonight?"

He smiled, glanced back over at the young woman, and then replied, "I'll stay ag'in if Catherine needs me to." Her eyes seemed to light up, and she responded in Cheyenne. He looked into Catherine's eyes and then without looking up at Dr. Mike said, "I guess I'm stayin'."

While changing into her long fleece gown and robe behind the curtain, she could see Sully once again take the colorful woolen blanket from the rocking chair and spread it on the floor before motioning Catherine to make herself comfortable by the fire. He then removed his tomahawk and knife from his belt and stretched down beside her…all without ever looking at Dr. Mike.

As she approached the bed and turned back the basket-pattern quilt, she whispered, "Goodnight," but was not rewarded with even so much as a glance by the man who had so recently traveled to Boston to profess his love to her. It was as if Catherine's arrival had bewitched him.

All of the occupants of the cabin quieted for the night, and Dr. Mike lay in her bed and watched Sully gently cover the sleeping woman next to him with his red poncho. He seemed to be enchanted with her… as if she had somehow captured his heart and soul. Silent tears trickled down her cheeks, and sleep was all but forgotten…

* * *

The rooster crowed his early morning wake-up call, and Dr. Mike rolled over to see the carefully folded blanket once again on the back of the rocker. Sully, Catherine, and even Wolf were gone.

Brian and Colleen still slept soundly, and she noticed Sully had left two empty coffee cups on the table, but there was no note, and the fire in the fireplace had long since burned out. With a chill from the cold mountain air, as well as a chill from the fear of losing the man she loved, she scurried from bed to fetch some wood from under the porch, stoke the fire, and start breakfast for herself and the family.

Once the bacon was frying in the cast-iron skillet, she called out to the children in what she hoped was a cheerful voice. "Brian, Colleen. Time to get up and get ready for school."

Suddenly the side door to the snug little cabin blasted open, and Matthew came barreling in and calling out "Mornin' everybody. Brrrr… It sure has turned cold."

Looking around, he asked in a puzzled voice. "Where's Sully and Catherine?"

Brian, overhearing his big brother's question, angrily replied before Dr. Mike could even formulate her response. "They left before dawn to go to the reservation. Won't be back until tomorrow, I guess. I wish she'd stay there. Sully don't even have time for us anymore."

"Brian!" Dr. Mike cried out. "Sully is your friend, and Catherine needs us all to help her right now. She just lost all her family."

"I don't care, Ma. I don't like her. I wish she'd leave."

Sighing with frustration, she said, "Colleen, will you go gather the eggs and Matthew, will you milk the cow while I talk to Brian?"

Colleen and Matthew, knowing Brian was about to get a Dr. Mike lecture, both quickly agreed. "Yes, ma'am. Yes, Dr. Mike." Colleen grabbed the basket and took off out the side door toward the chicken coop with Matthew on her heals.

"Brian, come here and sit down. We need to talk about your behavior, young man." Dr. Mike patted the chair next to hers.

He sidled over to the chair and sat on the edge of the seat.

"Brian, why are you so mad at Catherine and Sully? Have they done something to hurt your feelings?"

He looked down at the floor, then over at the fireplace…looking anywhere in the room but into his ma's eyes. He knew if he told her what he had seen at the clinic Sunday it would hurt her. He had gone to take some water to Catherine after she had gotten sick at the church-Dr. Mike called it a seizure-and he had seen her and Sully kissing. He was so mad at Sully—_how could he do that after going all the way to Boston to bring Dr. Mike back to Colorado? Didn't he love his ma and them anymore?_

Brian, knowing he couldn't tell her the truth, locked his hands behind his back and crossed his fingers. "No, Ma. I ain't real mad at them. I just wish things could go back to the way they were before Catherine came here."

Puzzled by his behavior, she hugged him and whispered, "Well, Sully cares about you, and Catherine wants to be your friend so please try to remember that. Okay?"

"Okay, Ma. I know, but, but what about…" He stumbled over whether he should tell his ma about Sully and Catherine kissing.

Finally that afternoon at the clinic, the secret seemed to be getting harder and harder to keep, and the words just spewed forth as he broke down in tears and told her about what he had seen in the upstairs recovery room. He even told her how Sully had tried to explain that kissing Catherine was like going fishing when you didn't want to. The look of quiet sadness on his ma's face and her words supporting Sully as a good man did not appease him, and his anger and hurt toward Sully just continued to fester.

Dr. Mike, who kept herself busy with patients all afternoon, reminded Brian of his real ma when she would get mad about somethin'. The madder his real ma was, the more she baked, and the harder she scrubbed clothes on the washboard.

Maybe that was how grownups got over being mad or hurt…

* * *

There had been no word from Sully since he and Catherine had rode out on Monday morning. Supper, Monday and Tuesday nights, were subdued affairs as Brian was still angry, Dr. Mike was quiet, and Colleen and Matthew were confused by their unusual demeanors.

After supper on Tuesday, Dr. Mike gathered up the necessary bandages and medicines so as to be ready to leave by sunup on Wednesday. Even though she was hurt and angry with Sully over what Brian had seen at the clinic, the trip out to the Galloway homestead would give them a chance to talk without Catherine's presence and also without the children's constant interruptions. Perhaps Brian had misinterpreted what he had seen, or there would be an explanation as to what had happened. If not, she worried that Sully was no longer interested in courting her and that he now had feelings for another woman. No matter, they needed to clear the air. The uncertainties of their relationship coupled with her own feelings of inadequacy were starting to wear on her, and the children were bound to notice there was a growing chasm between their ma and their best friend.


	2. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER 2**

The sun had just peaked over the mountain ridge to the east of the little homestead Wednesday morning when Matthew hitched up the buckboard wagon to take Colleen and Brian to school. They had all thought Sully would be there in time for breakfast so Colleen had made his favorite, blueberry pancakes. As the sun rose higher, Dr. Mike became more and more concerned about his continuing absence but did her best to hide her worries from the children.

She wrapped herself in her red flannel robe, leaned down to kiss Brian on the cheek, gave him a quick hug, and ruffled his shiny blonde hair before helping him climb up next to Matthew on the wagon.

"Brian, have a good day at school and be sure to come by the clinic this afternoon after school. Okay? Colleen is going to help me stock medicines so we can all go to Grace's for supper afterwards." She then smiled at the two older siblings and in her best parental voice reminded Matthew to be careful driving into town.

"Dr. Mike, where is Sully? I thought he was going with you to the Galloway's," Matthew maintained with a worried tone to his voice. "The road to their homestead is washed out, and you'll have to go through the gorge. I don't wanna think about you goin' by yourself."

"Sully always keeps his promises," chimed in Brian. "He'll be here."

She smiled at the three children she had come to love so much and assured them that Sully would be there soon and they could all have a family supper at Grace's that night.

As the wagon rode off she called out and said, "I love you all. See you later." A chorus of "Bye, Ma!" and "Bye, Dr. Mike!" rang out over the valley.

Turning back and entering the cabin, she dressed in her dark green woolen skirt and her plaid blouse. Brushing her hair, she let the soft waves drift downward toward her tiny waist but clipped her bangs back from her face with hair combs the way Sully liked her to wear it. She wanted to look her best when he got there and they had their talk.

* * *

The clock by the fireplace in the homestead struck eight-thirty, and there was still no sign of Sully. Dr. Mike continued to walk to the door, open it, and look for him and his Cheyenne pony to come riding up in a full gallop. Since he had gotten over his fear of horses, he seemed to enjoy riding, and they had enjoyed countless rides back and forth to town or to the reservation.

As the time approached nine o'clock, she became more and more agitated. Rather than the sun warming the chilly Rocky Mountain air, clouds were rolling in from the northwest, and it looked as if would be an overcast, gray day. The dismal weather seemed to mimic her mood.

_How dare he not show up? Did he not realize she had to go to the Galloway homestead that it was her duty as a doctor and the frail couple was counting on her to change the bandages on Mrs. Galloway's incision? Had he forgotten or was he hurt? Surely though, if he were hurt, Cloud Dancing would get word to her._

Rather than continuing to sit and fret, she decided she would go on to the Galloway's. If she hurried and was careful, the children would never know she went by herself. After all, she was a doctor and had taken an oath to take care of her patients, or in this case, patient.

She saddled Bear, tied her medical bag to the pommel, draped her heavyweight duster over the horse's withers, and then waited for a few more minutes just in case Sully should show up. Finally, because she could tarry no longer, she rode off down the dusty road toward the gorge. Even though she was running late, if she hurried she could make it out to the homestead, take care of Mrs. Galloway, and then be back at the clinic before her afternoon appointments. Bear, although old, was surefooted and should have no trouble picking his way through the rocky creek that split the gorge into high, concave banks. Though she much preferred to ride Flash, Bear would be easier to handle amongst the rocks and less likely to injure himself.

As she rode away from the homestead, the weight of her and Sully's courtship seemed to bog her down emotionally. It seemed Catherine was rapidly becoming a wedge that might drive them apart. If that happened, Dr. Mike knew she would never be able to get over the betrayal, and the pain would destroy her. Life without him would be unbearable…

* * *

The midday sun had completely disappeared behind a bank of dark, angry clouds as Dr. Mike mounted Bear to leave the Galloway's. The sweet, elderly couple had insisted she stay for an early lunch, and not wanting to disappoint them, she had reluctantly agreed. With Mr. Galloway's effusive words of, "Thank ya's for coming, Dr. Mike, and taking such good care of my Nellie," and his many words of caution to be careful when riding near the Hawkins cabin, she finally rode out shortly after one o'clock. She was going to be late for her afternoon appointments, but if she hurried and the weather held, she shouldn't be more than 30 minutes or so behind schedule. Brian and Colleen would start to worry if she were much later.

As Bear picked his way down the rocky creek to head back toward Colorado Springs, she was more and more distracted and deep in thought. The temperature was dropping, and a steady wind was starting to blow off the north face of the mountains. Stopping to drink from her canteen, she also noticed the water in the creek appeared to be deeper and moving faster. She wondered if there were rain falling up at the headwaters high in the mountains and if that were causing the creek to rise. No matter, she knew she still had time to be back at the clinic before the storm descended on the small Colorado town. However, it was getting colder so she hurriedly strapped her canteen back over the other side of her saddle pommel and reached for her canvas duster.

Before she could pick up the heavy coat, Bear bucked slightly and started fidgeting. His ears pricked as if there were something close by. Suddenly, a tree branch off to the right of the high creek bank snapped, and she knew she wasn't alone. She could feel eyes boring into her back.

"Hullo? Who's there?" she called out in a nervous but still friendly voice. There was no answer, and the forest was deadly silent. No birds chirped, and the overhanging trees seemed to be reaching out as if to grab the lone woman.

"Hullo? Anybody there?" Thinking it might be a wild animal, she hurriedly tightened her hands on the reins and nudged Bear forward. She could put on her warm coat later. If it were a bear or a mountain lion, she'd need to get out of the creek bed, or she would be trapped if the animal decided to attack.

"Git off my land or I'll shoot ya, ya hear?" The gravelly voice seemed to resonate throughout the gorge, and she could not place the speaker's location.

"I'm sorry, but I really am just passing through trying to get back to Colorado Springs," she called out in a quavering voice. Was this the old prospector Sully had mentioned…the one who thought everyone was a claim jumper and who was shooting at anyone who crossed his land? She wasn't sure where Mr. Hawkins lived along the creek, but the voice seemed threatening, and she was anxious to get away from him, get out of the cold, and back to the clinic.

Without any further warning, there was a whining sound, and Dr. Mike felt a horrendous stinging sensation in her upper right thigh. Looking down, she realized she had felt the impact of a bullet, and bright-red blood was already seeping down over the saddle and rapidly saturating her coat, as it lay draped over the saddle. There seemed to be blood everywhere, and her hip felt as if it were on fire. Bear, terrified at the sound of the gunshot, took off in a dead run, and she grabbed for his mane and tried to hang on as the horse careened through the rocks and the water.

Fearful that the bullet might have grazed an artery, she tried to use one hand to staunch the blood flow with the pleated material of her skirt. Bear, still nervous, had slowed somewhat but was skittish and hard to control. As she tried to keep hold of the reins, she could feel herself getting more and more lightheaded. Reaching for her medical bag, she could feel the warm stickiness of the blood as it coated her fingers, as well as the leather of the saddle.

Bear, smelling the blood, bucked once again, and Dr. Mike, too weak to hold on further, slid from his back onto the edge of the fast-moving cold waters of the creek. The icy water jerked her back to momentary consciousness. Crawling slowly on her belly and dragging her injured leg, she managed to reach the steep clay bank. There was just enough of a dry silt-and-pebble island under the overhanging bank and willow tree to pull herself out of the frigid creek. Her last conscious thought was of the feeling of watery iciness that permeated her clothing and her skin.

Her final silent pleas were for Sully's comforting arms to hold her, protect her, and pull her back from the dark abyss of what must certainly be her death…


	3. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER 3**

Colleen and Brian finished up their day at school and then walked hand in hand toward the clinic to meet up with Dr. Mike.

"Do you think Ma will let me go by Mr. Bray's and get some gumdrops?" Brian loved the sweet little treats, and he hadn't had any since the previous week.

"Brian, all you think about is candy," Colleen retorted in her best older-sister voice.

Arriving at the clinic, the brother and sister were surprised to find the three o'clock patient sitting on the bench and no sign of Dr. Mike. Mr. Tompkins had been waiting for 30 minutes and was not happy with the delay. Colleen opened the clinic door, called out for Dr. Mike, and invited the grumpy patient in from the cold. It was obvious to her that Dr. Mike had not been there all day as untouched wooden crates of medicine were still piled on the examining room table where Matthew had stacked them yesterday.

Brian, realizing she was not there, started up the stairs all the while calling "Ma? Ma?" Getting no response, he ran back down the steps to where Colleen was refilling Mr. Tompkins' small bottle of stinging nettle herbs that aided his allergies when made into a tea.

"Colleen. Where's Ma?" Brian demanded with a slight panicky sound to his voice. "She promised we could all go to Grace's when she and Sully got back."

The long afternoon wore on, and Colleen turned away several more patients. Luckily, none had ailments that couldn't wait until the following day. As the hours crept on, the temperature continued to drop, and a cold drizzle seemed to settle over the town. The streets became deserted, and even the saloon was quiet for a change.

The two children became more and more fearful for Dr. Mike and Sully.

As the sky darkened into evening, Matthew arrived by wagon at the clinic to pick up his brother and sister, eat supper at Grace's Café with the family, and then ride alongside Dr. Mike back to the homestead.

What he found at the clinic were two frightened children and no sign of the couple that had come to be their surrogate parents.

"Dr. Mike and Sully ain't back yet?" he asked in a puzzled voice.

"We ain't, I mean, we haven't seen them," replied Colleen, "and Dr. Mike had a bunch of people who needed to see her today."

"I'm hungry," Brian interrupted his sister and called out plaintively, "I ain't eaten except for those peaches during recess."

Matthew popped Brian on the side of the head and grinned. "Little brother, you're always hungry!"

Colleen, bringing the conversation back to what was important, turned to Matthew and asked whether they should go look for them.

"Nah. Let's go out to the homestead and see if they're there. Besides, all I got is the wagon, and I can't go lookin' for them in that. I'll need to saddle Scout."

The three Cooper children gathered up books and coats, blew out the oil lamps, and closed the door to the clinic. As they loaded up into the wagon, the cold wind was the only noise that could be heard in the small Colorado town.

* * *

Sully and Catherine had arrived at the Cheyenne encampment two days ago, and she had happily joined the women in tanning several deer hides and preserving the meat for future use. Cloud Dancing could not help but notice the shy looks the beautiful woman cast Sully when he was not looking. Sully, who was busy meeting with Black Kettle and hunting with the braves, did not seem to notice anything amiss. Although Snowbird was gracious, Cloud Dancing could see the worry in her dark eyes as she watched her husband's brother and the former Indian captive. Her concern was for Dr. Mike…her friend, her sister. Sully seemed oblivious to Catherine's attentions, but Snowbird knew Dr. Mike would see the adoring looks and be suspicious of the woman's behavior.

"My husband. Have you talked to your younger brother about the guest he has brought us?" asked Snowbird in a determined voice.

"He says they are only friends and he feels sorry for her because of what has happened," he responded. "Spirits have told me that nothing good can come of this though. I see a black cloud coming down from Father Sky and settling on the shoulders of my little brother."

"They sleep in the empty teepee together, and I fear Dr. Mike will not understand," responded a worried Snowbird. "He has pledged himself to Medicine Woman and now acts as if he will take two wives."

Cloud Dancing turned to his wife of many years and smiled. Knowing of her scorn for the Cheyenne tradition of taking two wives when a death left a woman without a husband, he gently pointed out that his brother's culture did not permit two wives.

"Besides, Spirits tell me that though they share a teepee, they do not share a blanket and Dr. Mike is all that is in my younger brother's heart."

"Fine. But what is in Shivering Deer's heart, husband? Have Spirits answered that question?"

As Cloud Dancing and Snowbird entered their snug teepee to escape the cold and dampness of the growing storm, both were left to ponder the fate of their dear friends. Spirits had told of more darkness to come…

* * *

Beside the bank of the rocky creek, Dr. Mike slowly opened her eyes and looked toward the ever-darkening sky. The pain in her hip was unbearable, but the cold had left the rest of her small body numb and her mind disoriented.

"Sully, Sully. Where are you? Help me. Sully…" Her voice seemed to quietly fade away in the wind, and there were only the sounds of the rushing water to answer her pleas.

The cold and dark night wrapped itself around the injured woman, and unconsciousness claimed her once again. Unbeknownst to her, small creatures scurried close by as they sought a warm den in the hillside, the rushing of the ever-climbing creek water grew louder, and a lone wolf howled for its mate off in the distance.


	4. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER 4**

Brian, Colleen, and Matthew rode into the homestead, and their fears for Dr. Mike and Sully grew as they realized the cabin windows were dark and no smoke came from the chimney. Pup barked happily as the children jumped from the wagon. Matthew quickly unhooked the horse's traces as Colleen ran to feed her prized chickens.

Matthew in his best grownup, authoritative voice instructed, "Brian! Milk the cow and feed Pup. I'm going to feed the horses and saddle Scout. Colleen? Will you pack my saddlebags with some food, medicines, and bandages? Also, get me some blankets. I'll ride out to the reservation and see if they're there. You two stay here and get your homework done so Dr. Mike won't be mad when she gets home."

Realizing the seriousness of the situation, the two did not argue. As Matthew led a saddled Scout from the barn, he donned his heavy canvas coat and pulled his hat down over his face to ward off the cold rain and sleet. Colleen threw the packed saddlebags over Scout's rump and rushed to close the barn door behind him.

Brian called out to his brother, "Matthew. Tell Ma I miss 'er an' I'll sure be glad when she gets back home."

Matthew turned to his two siblings to tell them to get back in the house and out of the cold, when the sound of a horse's hooves could be heard trotting up the dirt road.

"That's gotta be Ma." Brian shouted.

The children watched in hope and then in fear as Bear trotted riderless toward the warmth of the barn. Matthew reached and grabbed the dangling reins. It was then that he saw and felt the stickiness of the blood on the saddle and the dark stain of blood on Dr. Mike's coat. Trying to keep Brian from seeing the horror of all the blood, he turned the horse away from his little brother and motioned for his sister to follow him inside the barn. Colleen, upon entering the barn, saw the look on her brother's face, and as his eyes cut toward the saddle, she gasped at the sight.

"Don't say anything to Brian. It'll just scare him." he encouraged her. "I'll find 'em. Just keep Brian from seeing this."

"What do you think happened, Matthew?"

"I don't know, but Sully knows how to take care of himself in the woods, and he would never let anything happen to Dr. Mike. Just keep this to yourself so Brian don't get in a panic. Okay?"

As Brian tried to enter the barn, she grabbed Dr. Mike's medical bag to take it into the cabin, and then she took Brian by the shoulders. "Let's go feed that growly stomach of yours." Her last look over her shoulder at Matthew spoke of her worry for Ma and Sully.

He quickly unsaddled and fed Bear, wiped the blood off the saddle, and hid the bloody coat under a stack of hay before galloping out into the night to search for his family. As he rode off, he could hear Colleen trying to answer Brian's many questions and allay his fears.

It was going to be a long night for everyone…

* * *

As darkness settled around the Indian encampment, Sully and Catherine sat cross-legged by the fire in the teepee. She was starting to remember more and more small incidents from her childhood in Baltimore and kept up a steady stream of quiet chatter. Sully, never one to be talkative, seemed to be even withdrawn than usual. The only sounds, other than the young woman's voice, were the crackling of the fire, the occasional snuffling snore of Wolf as he slept by his beloved human companion, and the steady pattering of rain and occasional sleet on the sides of the teepee.

He appeared preoccupied, and Catherine could see furrows developing in the space between his sky-blue eyes. Leaning over toward him, she placed her hand on his heart and reached up to cup his face with her palm.

"What troubles you?" she asked in a soft voice. Not getting a response, she leaned as if to kiss him softly on the lips like she had done several days ago.

"No!" he shouted and pushed her hand away. Then in a kinder voice he said, "Catherine, we need to talk about me and Dr. Mike."

"You and Dr. Mike?" Catherine asked in a puzzled voice. "She is just your friend, no?"

"No, Catherine. She is so much more than my friend. She's the woman I love, my heartsong. The only woman I love, and I fear now I may have hurt her."

"But why, how, Sully?"

"I should never have let you kiss me, and even though she don't know about it… it was wrong. Also, I know you needed a friend, but I should never have stayed out here with ya. It ain't right. I need to get back to Dr. Mike first thing in the mornin'."

He looked at Catherine and realized his words had hurt her also, and for that he was sorry. However, he had also hurt Dr. Mike with his attentions to another woman.

"Catherine, listen, ya need to decide if you want to go to the Northern Cheyenne camp or if you want to go back to Baltimore. Whatever you decide, let me know in the mornin' 'cause I'm leavin' at first light to go back to Colorado Springs. Okay?"

She hesitated and then seemed to draw back into her own body before finally responding. "There is nothing left for me here. My family is gone, your heart belongs to Dr. Mike who is a good woman, and I must try to make a new life." She hesitated once again and then whispered, "Sully, I will go to Baltimore and live with my grandmother."

He looked at her across the small campfire and nodded. "You can stay here until I book ya a ticket on the next stage to St. Louis. It'll probably be a couple of days. I'll come back and get ya when it's time."

She dropped her chin downward so that her long blonde hair could hide her tears, sighed softly, and then stretched out by the warmth of the fire. No further words were exchanged.

Sully, realizing that she would be cold as the night progressed, draped his red poncho over the sleeping young woman. Only then did he realize that he had done the same for Dr. Mike when she had first come to the Cheyenne camp. Somehow, the memory of that time seemed to fill him with a longing for something he couldn't let go of. Now, his thoughts were focused on getting back to his heartsong and making everything right again. As he lay watching the campfire flames flickering on the walls of the teepee, he could feel anxiety and a sense of foreboding welling up inside him. There was an overwhelming feeling of some elusive thought or action he had forgotten. She needed him. It was as if he could hear her calling his name, her cries for him seemed to fill his head and his heart.

Finally, the warmth of the fire soothed him, and his troubled mind finally calmed as sleep claimed him…his last thoughts before drifting away were of his heartsong and how he would see her tomorrow.

He would be with her tomorrow. She needed him and he always kept his promises...

* * *

Dr. Mike came to again as she felt frigid water dripping down on her face from the bank above her head. Even though it was too dark to see, she could hear the roar of the creek as the water level continued to rise. The cold, however, had slowed the bleeding at her hip. Now, there was just a throbbing pain anytime she moved or when the shivering from the cold overtook her. Her lungs and throat burned with pain, and her breathing was becoming raspy and uneven. She knew she had to move or she would die of exposure and blood loss. Trying to drag herself with her injured hip up the steep bank would be impossible. All she could do was wrap her damp skirt more closely around her small frame, tuck her hands inside her blouse against her skin in an effort to ward off frostbite, and pray that Sully would find her.

She knew he was the only one who could save her and he always kept his promises…


	5. Chapter 5

**CHAPTER 5**

Matthew rode into the Cheyenne village and was immediately surrounded by braves who guarded the camp from any attacking soldiers. They spoke only in Cheyenne, and he was at a loss to convey his urgent need to find Dr. Mike and Sully. As he tried helplessly to explain with words and hand motions, the flap of a nearby teepee opened, and he recognized Cloud Dancing in the dim light.

"Ha-ho, my friend. What brings you here?" he called in a puzzled voice.

"Cloud Dancing! Thank goodness. Have you seen Sully or Dr. Mike? They went to see one of her patients today, and they ain't got home."

"Sully? He is here, but I have not seen Dr. Mike in several moons. Come. I will take you to his teepee." He motioned for the young man to dismount and follow him to the furthest edge of the village.

As they approached the teepee, Matthew, realizing Dr. Mike wasn't here and Sully was not with her, began to panic. _Where was she? Why wasn't Sully with her? They were supposed to go visit a patient this mornin'._ As Cloud Dancing silently pushed open the flap to the snug little teepee, Matthew saw Sully asleep by the fire, and Catherine was curled up next to him with her blond head cradled on his chest. Sully's poncho protected them both from the chill, and his arms were wrapped tightly around the beautiful sleeping woman.

Seeing what he thought was a betrayal of his ma, he screamed out, "What in the hell is goin' on in here? Sully, where's Dr. Mike?"

Jolted out of a deep but troubled sleep, Sully leapt to his feet and grabbed for his hunting knife. "What? What's the matter? Matthew? What are you doin' here?"

Still yelling, he started toward Sully with his fists clinched, and only Cloud Dancing's swift intervention prevented him from taking a swing at him. "No, Matthew. This is not the time for this." He held up his hand as if to silence any further outbursts.

"I wanna know where Dr. Mike is, Sully. An' why are ya sleepin' here with Catherine?" Having been awakened by Sully's sudden departure and all the yelling, the young woman sat up from the warm nest by the fire and watched silently.

"Whadaya mean, Matthew? Dr. Mike should be at the homestead." Sully, still shocked by Matthew's sudden arrival, seemed at a loss to answer the questions he was pelting him with.

"Well she ain't. You were gonna ride out to the Galloway homestead with her this mornin', and she ain't got home. Did ya go with her or not?" Matthew seemed to spit the words at the bewildered mountain man.

"She went to the Galloway's by herself? Why would she do a fool thing like that? Ol' man Hawkins is shootin' at anything that moves near his claim!" he cried out in surprise.

Matthew, suddenly realizing Sully had forgotten his promise to accompany Dr. Mike, started toward the man who had always been there for him and his family. "Ya promised Sunday night you'd take her this mornin'. You were even the one who told her it was too dangerous for her to go alone and you'd be back from visitin' Cloud Dancin' and ride with her."

Sully, looking as if an arrow had just pierced his heart, slowly raised his head and looked at the younger man as the realization of the forgotten promise finally hit him. His breath seemed to catch, and he struggled to swallow as his failure settled over his shoulders like a black cloud.

"Matthew? She's not back? When did she leave?" Sully cried out.

"I don't know. Sometime after sunup. She shoulda been back after lunch." He then had to tell the rest of what he knew. "But Sully, there's somethin' else ya gotta know. Bear wandered in about dusk, and Dr. Mike's saddle and coat were covered in blood."

"Blood?" The word galvanized Sully into action, and he turned, grabbed his buckskin coat and his tomahawk, and called for Wolf. "Cloud Dancing. I need your fastest horse, some food, and a torch. I gotta go find Dr. Mike. She needs me!"

Matthew grabbed him by the arm and declared, "I'm goin' with ya. We'll have a better chance to find her if we both go." He nodded. His mind was already on searching the trail, as he had to find Dr. Mike.

Her life depended on him, and his life depended on finding her…

As the three men and Wolf exited the teepee, no one spoke to Catherine, and she was left alone to ponder her future and the fate of the kind woman who had befriended her.

* * *

The pain had returned to her hip, and a deep, hacking cough had settled in her lungs. Consciousness came and went, but the cold and dampness of the night air were a constant threat. She knew she was running a high fever, and it was only a matter of time before she would never awaken again. _Who would take care of the children? Who would read to Brian when he had a nightmare? Did Sully really know how much she loved him? Where was Sully? Was he with Catherine? Why hadn't he come to find her?_ The questions seemed to herald a strange staccato beat inside her head.

The rain had stopped, and now a heavy, dense fog was settling down into the narrow valley. The concave bank of the creek offered little protection from the elements, and hypothermia was shutting down her organs but not her thoughts. She could no longer feel the cold, and the voice of her dear father filled her head. He would want his beloved Mike to fight, to not give up, and to be brave.

Unfortunately, time had run out, and she slipped away to the warmth that was only in her mind. Her last conscious thought was to call out silently for her heartsong, her Sully. The man who could have saved her.

Who had promised to love her…always.


	6. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER 6**

Sully and Matthew rode out of the Cheyenne village at a fast clip, and no words were exchanged between the worried men. Matthew was still fuming at what he had seen at the Cheyenne village and over what he thought was unforgivable behavior on Sully's part. Sully, from the vantage of his horse, could see the residual anger in Matthew's sullen face. There would be time later to make amends to the children he loved and cared for as if they were his own. Now he had to focus on finding Dr. Mike, and fast.

It was still an hour's hard ride to the creek, and he was already counting the hours she had been missing. _Could she survive that long in the cold and the sleet? Had she found shelter or was she too hurt to protect herself from any danger? Maybe the blood wasn't hers. _The "what ifs" seemed to overwhelm him, and he spurred the paint horse into an even faster pace. The worst "what if" was too unimaginable, and he prayed to the Spirits and begged for their help in finding her, his beloved heartsong. His grief and the guilt over his failure to keep his promise were unbearable.

_How could he have forgotten his promise to take her to the Galloway homestead?_ He so enjoyed riding with her and listening to her lilting Boston accent as they traversed the land he loved. Why had he let his concern and sympathy for Catherine get in the way of being there for Dr. Mike?

Everybody always thought Dr. Mike was so strong. But Sully knew better. He had seen the tiredness in her eyes when she worked long hours at the clinic, the small sighs of fatigue as she helped Brian or Colleen with homework or a school project after a long day of caring for Colorado Springs' citizens, or how she always had time to accompany him to the Cheyenne village if there was an injury or an illness. She continually gave more of herself than she ever got in return. Even with all that goodness in her heart, she still endured the hostility of those who questioned her abilities as a doctor.

Now she was out there, alone, possibly hurt, cold, hungry…all while he had spent the afternoon with his Cheyenne family…enjoying their companionship and camaraderie, the warmth of the campfire, a fine meal of deer stew…oblivious to the hurt he had inflicted on the woman he loved more than his own life.

Sully's guilt drove him forward. He had to find her before it was too late…

* * *

Colleen and Brian kept vigil by the window nearest the front door of the snug little cabin. Supper and homework had been solemn affairs, and even Brian, who was almost always a chatterbox as Dr. Mike called him, was strangely silent. Pup, missing his best buddy Wolf, lounged by the fire and slept intermittently throughout the long night.

Finally, as the hours crawled toward midnight, they left their post by the window and huddled together on Dr. Mike's bed. Silent tears streamed down both of their worried faces as thoughts of losing another mother swirled through their heads.

Both prayed like the Reverend had taught them. They needed God to bring their ma home again. To bring Sully and Matthew home again.

The family would not be complete until they were all under the same roof…

* * *

Sully and Matthew rode into the night, finally reaching the creek near the Galloway homestead. "Do ya think we oughta go to the Galloway's and see if Dr. Mike is there?" asked Matthew.

"No. If she's not there, then we'll have wasted an hour for nuthin'. I say we start lookin' down the creek toward ol' man Hawkins' place. Besides that, if she is out there, then we gotta get to her fast. If we don't find her soon though, you can ride to the Galloway's, check with them, and go get help in town if she's not there. I'll keep lookin' along the creek banks in the meantime."

Matthew, seeing the concerned resolve in Sully's face, speculated, "Surely, she wouldn't stay by the creek. It's too damp and cold. I'd think she would have looked for some shelter away from the water."

"Not if she's too hurt to make it up the sides of the bank, Matthew. From the amount of blood you tol' me was on her saddle, she may be too weak to walk. We gotta look on both sides of the creek. Be careful though. The water's up, and it'll be harder for the horses to keep their footin'. Look for any signs she mighta tried to climb out."

"Wolf, come here, boy. Find! Go find Dr. Mike." Wolf, hearing the worry in his loyal friend's voice, gave a short whine and a sharp woof and then took off in the direction of the creek.

They edged their horses down the slippery bank and started searching on either side of the rolling creek waters. The flame torches sent eerie patterns of light against the shadowy banks as the horses carefully picked their way through the rocky waters and wooden debris.

"Dr. Mike! Michaela! Where are you? Dr. Mike, can you hear us?" The combined voices of the two men reverberated off the narrow walls of the gorge and seemed to echo forever. "Dr. Mike! Dr. Mike!"

Wolf, walking on the edge of the bank, kept a watchful eye on his human friends, all while still keeping his nose to the sodden ground. There was no scent other than that of the small woodland creatures who roamed the forest and drank from the side of the creek. As the search continued, Sully's loyal canine-like companion could feel the tension and worry increasing, and he could hear the hoarseness in his friend's voice as he continued to call out for his beloved.

The banks on the creek got higher the further the two riders traveled. This, coupled with how the water had washed out hollows and undercut the sides of the gorge, made searching even more difficult.

"Matthew. What was Dr. Mike wearing when she left this mornin'? It's so dark I can't see real well. I think it might be better if I get off and walk for a while." He swiftly dismounted his horse and holding the torch took off walking by the creek.

"She wasn't dressed before I left, Sully. I just know she ain't got her coat. I think I'll do what you're doin' and walk the other side of the creek."

"Keep a lookout in case she crawled up on a rock or log. She woulda known she had to get away from the risin' water if she could."

The two men continued looking, pulling their reluctant horses by their reins, as they desperately searched for Dr. Mike.


	7. Chapter 7

**CHAPTER 7**

She sluggishly opened her eyes and turned her head toward the familiar sound. Someone was frantically calling her name. She was all warm and snug in her bed, and even though the voice seemed desperate for her attention, she was reluctant to move from her warm cocoon. _Was it Brian? Had he had a nightmare? Was it Colleen or Matthew? Sully?_ The possibilities seemed to race through her feverish mind.

No. It couldn't be Sully. He was with Catherine at the reservation. Brian had even seen them kiss at the clinic. He wouldn't be the one calling her name. The reality of Sully's betrayal was more than she could bear. It would be better to slip back into her dreams where thoughts of him were still pure, uncomplicated. Where he still loved her and wanted to be with her…not another woman.

As she slipped further and further away, from the cold, the pain in her hip, and the unfathomable hurt associated with Sully's disloyalty, her heart weakened. The beats were getting shallower and slower. The wracking cough and burning of her skin from the insidious infection were finally claiming her body, and now her mind was drifting…drifting away to where all her dreams were happy and there was blessed oblivion from the hurt.

* * *

Just as Sully was ready to call out to Matthew and tell him to go to the Galloway's and back to town for help, a sense of dire gloom painfully invaded his heart. As he walked the edge of the water he prayed to the Spirits, to God, to anyone that would listen. He prayed to find Michaela, for her to be safe, for her to forgive him for the unforgivable. Most of all he prayed for her very life to be spared. The agony was consuming him and dragging him down toward hell. He had to find her before it was too late!

Sully, so focused on his pain, at first did not hear his name shouted. "Sully! I see something up ahead. Look!" Matthew started running toward the bend in the swollen creek, his waterlogged boots carrying him over the rocky bank.

"Sully! I think its Dr. Mike. There, under that overhanging willow tree. Look!"

Dropping the reins of both horses the two men scrambled over the rushing water and crawled toward the sodden mass half hidden under the tree branches.

"Oh my God! It's Dr. Mike, Sully!" He dropped to his knees beside her lifeless body as Sully rushed to roll her over and check for a pulse. Barely feeling the beating of her heart, he shouted at Matthew to go get the horses. "We got to get her out of here. She's dying, Matthew. Hurry! Hurry!" he called in a frantic tone toward the young man.

Matthew grabbed Scout and pulled him toward Sully before crossing back over the rocks to retrieve the other horse. He then untied the saddlebags Colleen had packed earlier and grabbed the woolen blanket she had folded inside. "Here, Sully. Wrap her in this."

He brushed the long, wet tendrils of coppery-colored hair from her face. Her lips were blue, and the skin around her eyes had turned translucent. As he coddled her in the blanket, he could see where blood had soaked her skirt. Forgetting momentarily the propriety that she had been raised to believe in, he pushed her skirt aside and tore at the lace of her pantaloons. Upon exposing her hip he could see the angry round hole and gash caused by the trail of a bullet. Luckily, the bleeding had almost stopped.

Tears streamed down Sully's cheeks, and his normally bright blue eyes had turned to a stormy gray as he carefully picked up his heartsong and carried her toward the waiting horses._ Had she always been this light in his arms? He didn't remember her feeling so tiny when he had carried her during the influenza epidemic. Did she have frostbite? Had she lost too much blood to survive? Could they get her back to the homestead before she died? No! He would not allow her to die. She couldn't leave him. Everybody else had left him. Not Michaela._ _No!_ His jumbled thoughts continued as Matthew helped him lift her up into the saddle. Once she was in his lap, he pulled the blanket up close to her face and wrapped his arms tightly around her small frame.

"Come on, Matthew. We gotta get her back to the homestead."

He mounted his own horse and led the way out of the gorge. "Should we take her to the homestead or to the clinic?"

Sully thought for just a second and responded, "No, take her to the homestead. Colleen'll be there, and she'll know what to do. If we take her to town, then we'll have to wait on Colleen to get to the clinic."

"What if she needs a doctor, Sully? Can we get one to come from Denver?"

"She ain't gonna need a doctor. Colleen will fix her up. I know it." As he spoke the words, he prayed he was doing the right thing. The decisions he made now could determine whether Michaela lived or died. He couldn't be wrong. Her very life could depend on him. He had already made one mistake, and he couldn't afford another one.

Sully knew he had to make her well again, and she had to forgive him for what he had not done…he had not kept his promise.

* * *

Catherine lay back by the small campfire in the teepee, and her thoughts drifted first from her husband who had been killed by the soldiers, then to Sully, and finally to the life she had led as a child in Baltimore. There was nothing left for her here, and Sully had made it plain he did not return her feelings of love. It was best that she leave. Maybe Cloud Dancing would help her get to Colorado Springs in the morning. The sooner she left, the sooner her heartache could start to heal.

As she lay contemplating her future, Cloud Dancing and Snowbird reclined on a buffalo-skin throw in their teepee and talked of Sully and Dr. Mike. The Spirits had foretold of great pain and sorrow for his younger brother, and the medicine man could only wait for any further message. Snowbird, not one to patiently wait, kept looking at her husband for answers and guidance.

Suddenly, he lifted his head toward the sky and seemed to be listening to an unheard voice. He turned to his wife and spoke softly. "He has found her, but Spirits cannot say if she will live. It is bad."

"That bad?" she inquired worriedly.

"Spirits say we must pray for a healing…not only for Dr. Mike but for my brother. For I fear if she does not live, he will not live either."

As the night slowly moved toward dawn, Cloud Dancing and Snowbird sought the help of Spirits for their friends and hoped the light of day would bring good omens.

* * *

As Sully and Matthew galloped toward the homestead with Dr. Mike's lifeless body draped across Sully's saddle, both men prayed silently. At one point in the long journey, Sully thought he heard Michaela's soft voice call his name. However, when he looked down at her beautiful face, her eyes remained shut, and her breath was just a whisper against his hand. He could feel the blood from her hip pooling on his buckskins, and he knew she was bleeding again. The ride to the cabin was taking an even greater toll on what little bit of life she had left.

"Matthew, we're almost there. Ride ahead and tell Colleen. Tell her what's happened. You need to prepare her and Brian both," he shouted over the thundering hooves.

"Okay. But Sully, you and I gotta talk after Colleen takes care of Dr. Mike. I gotta have ya promise that ya won't hurt my little brother and sister. I need to know you're gonna be there for Dr. Mike and them. Otherwise, ya need to leave us alone."

"Matthew! This is not the time, but I can promise you I love ya all like you're my own flesh an' blood, an' I love your ma more than my own life."

Matthew nodded and then rode off toward the homestead. Sully, who carried his precious burden, followed as fast as he dared. A half-hour later, he rode into the homestead as well and saw the children gathered on the porch, waiting and watching. The fear in their young faces was palpable. They had already lost so much, and to lose their new ma would be unthinkable.

However, Dr. Mike and Sully were finally home. That was the first step in restoring their family…in rebuilding their lives together…in keeping the promise.


	8. Chapter 8

**CHAPTER 8**

As he slid off the back of his horse, the precious bundle containing Dr. Mike wrapped tightly in his arms, Colleen rushed through the open door into the cabin and gathered towels and dry clothes for the woman she loved like a mother. Sully sidled through the wooden door and immediately felt the warmth of a brightly burning fire. For a quick moment, he forgot that he carried his desperately ill heartsong and was rather surprised to not see her by the stove or reading in her rocking chair. Then, as if the fates needed to cruelly remind him of his failures, she shivered in his arms and let out a soft moan of pain. Sully, hearing the sound, quickly placed her on the bed and stood back so as to give Colleen room to care for her patient. She immediately started to remove Dr. Mike's damp clothing.

"Brian! Go get a bucket of water and heat it on the stove. Sully, grab a towel and dry Dr. Mike's hair. We've gotta get her dry and warm." Colleen kept up a litany of instructions as she turned to the small table next to the bed to pick up Dr. Mike's prized stethoscope. "I ain't sure, but she's let me listen to people's hearts and lungs before. I hope I know what to listen for."

Sully was gently rubbing Dr. Mike's long coppery locks of hair with a small towel and reluctantly lifted his eyes from her ashen face to look at Colleen. "Ya'll do fine. Dr. Mike has taught ya well."

"But Sully, she's barely breathin'. Maybe we ought to go get Mr. Slicker. Besides, I don't know how to remove a bullet."

Matthew, who had been carrying firewood in and stacking it by the stove, turned toward his sister. "Do ya want me to ride into town and get Jake?"

Sully, still carefully drying his beloved's hair, raised his head to look at the two oldest siblings. "No! Not yet. If we need to, we'll send for a real doctor from Denver."

"But Sully, I…" Colleen cried out in fear as he raised his hand to stop her from speaking.

"I ain't gonna let Dr. Mike die. Ya hear? We're not gonna let her die."

Brian had just come through the side door of the cabin and heard Sully's impassioned words. He immediately assumed the worst.

"Ma's dyin!" he screamed, then buried his small face into the side of Matthew's leg, and started sobbing. Matthew reached down and picked him up into his arms. "Come on, little brother. Let's go unsaddle Scout and feed the horses. Dr. Mike's not gonna die. I promise ya that." As he carried his crying brother from the cabin, he looked back at Colleen and Sully as if to reassure himself that what he had said was true.

Colleen turned back to the bed and quickly continued removing the layers of damp clothing. "Sully, go finish heatin' the water on the stove while I get her into a dry nightgown."

Sully, who had been crouched on his knees at the far side of bed, reached over and took Dr. Mike's small hand into his larger one. He planted a tender kiss in the still chilled palm of her delicate hand and then rose to do Colleen's bidding. As he turned to walk across the wooden floor, she could see his face was wet from tears. There would be time later to talk, but right now Colleen knew that she had to get Dr. Mike warm and then look at the wound in her hip. As he stood by the stove waiting for the water to heat, Colleen once again turned to pick up the stethoscope and place it against Dr. Mike's chest. Although she wasn't sure, it sounded like pneumonia in both lungs. There was a crackling, bubbly sound as she moved the chestpiece across her narrow ribcage. Even her heartbeats sounded fainter than what they should be. She was also running a fever, and her shallow breathing was becoming raspy and labored. If it was pneumonia, then she knew there was nothing she could do but keep her comfortable and treat the fever with quinine.

After dressing Dr. Mike in a warm, flannel nightgown, she moved on to look at the wound in her hip. Although the bleeding had virtually stopped, the bullet still had to be removed so the wound could be closed. Colleen had helped stitch patients before but had never dealt with a bullet wound, and she and Dr. Mike and never really discussed the proper way to remove a slug. She had only seen the procedure done one time. Sully'd brought Black Kettle to the homestead after the army had shot him, and Dr. Mike had removed a bullet from his throat. This was long before Colleen had even thought about someday being a doctor. Still, it had to come out. Otherwise, infection was certain.

Sully returned from the stove carrying a large earthenware bowl of warm water and a rag. He knelt down beside the bed and started to wash the dried mud from Dr. Mike's face and hands.

"Sully, I gotta remove the bullet, and I'm gonna need your help. Can you do it? Can you help me, or do ya want me to get Matthew to help?" She knew he was both emotionally fragile and exhausted. And unfortunately, he was probably remembering the pain of losing his wife and baby in the same cabin so many years ago.

He raised his tortured eyes up from the bed to look into the face of the teenaged girl. She was wise beyond her years and seemed to know of his inner struggle. He swallowed and whispered, "I'll do it. She needs me."

She nodded and smiled softly. This mountain man, whom she loved like a father, seemed to square his shoulders as if he was being forced to engage an unknown enemy in battle.

"Okay then. Roll her slightly toward you and hold 'er. I'm afraid to use the chloroform 'cause of her breathin'. So whatever happens, don't let her move."

Rather than reach across the bed to hold Dr. Mike, Sully rose from his knees off the floor, lay down beside her, and wrapped his arms around her shoulders and waist. He then placed his chin on top of her head and lightly kissed her hair. "Okay, I got 'er."

The door to the cabin swung back open, and Matthew stuck his head through the opening. "Brian's calmed down. Do ya need my help with anything?"

Sully lifted his head and spoke softly to the young man who had been so instrumental in finding his heartsong. "No, Matthew. Thanks though. Just keep Brian out in the barn. Colleen's gonna try to remove the bullet and stitch Dr. Mike up. He don't need to be in here while she does that. Just tell him his ma is gonna be fine."

He nodded, looked at the worried face of his little sister, and silently shut the door to the cabin. As the door closed, a cold breeze swept through the cabin, and Dr. Mike shivered even in her unconscious state.

Colleen dropped to her knees by the bed, pulled the table with the oil lamp and surgical instruments closer, and slid the nightgown further away from the angry wound. Before proceeding further, she looked across the narrow bed and met Sully's blue eyes with her own brown ones. Without stopping to think or even second-guess her actions, she then picked up the bottle of alcohol, sprayed Dr. Mike's blood encrusted hip and turned to pick up the medium scalpel from the instrument tray.

As she cut into the smooth flesh of Dr. Mike's hip so as to widen the opening, Sully could feel his beloved heartsong unconsciously flinch from the pain inflicted by the scalpel. He tightened his arms around her quivering body and nodded for Colleen to continue.

"Sully, I need you to hold this retractor clamp for me. Can you hold it and still not let her move?"

"Yeah." He loosened his hand from her waist and reached to hold the clamp as Colleen took the surgical forceps and started to probe the deep wound. Dr. Mike began to moan, and Colleen knew that somewhere in the recesses of her mind, the pain must be tremendous.

As she dug deeper into the incision, she realized that the bullet might have grazed the hipbone, what Dr. Mike had told her was called the crest of the ilium. She could feel a jagged roughness with her small fingers and forceps as she continued to probe for the lead ball. There was no way to determine the damage to the hipbone. Finally, the forceps scraped against the small metal sphere, and she was able to pull it from the bloody wound. He looked at her and nodded but still did not relax his hold on his heartsong.

Colleen turned back to the surgical tray, reached for a curved needle and silken thread, and then started the arduous task of stitching up the wound with individually tied knots.

Although it had seemed like hours, the clock by the fireplace showed only thirty-five minutes had passed since she had started probing for the bullet. Other than moaning and involuntary spasmodic movements, her patient had not awoken.

Sully eased himself off the bed as Colleen finished bandaging the wound. The side door opened, and Matthew and Brian hesitantly slipped in to see if there was any good news. Sully silently nodded at Matthew's raised eyebrow, and Brian crept over to the bed to hold his ma's hand.

A promise had been kept. Sully had gotten Dr. Mike home, gotten her help…and she was still alive.


	9. Chapter 9

**CHAPTER 9**

The children had all stretched out on the cots in the side room of the cabin and were sleeping soundly. Pup and Wolf snoozed by the fire.

Sully, too restless and anxious to sleep, sat in the rocker next to Dr. Mike's bed. As she lay there, he held her hand and watched the light from the oil lamp flicker across her delicate facial features. Every so often, she would moan softly as if locked in some sort of painful nightmare. He just wanted to stretch down next to her again, pull her into his arms, and protect her from all that was bad in the world. However, he knew that she lay there because of him…because of his own stupidity and forgetfulness.

As he thought back on the last several days, his actions had not been something he could be proud of. He could see how Matthew could have wrongly interpreted the scene in the teepee. What Matthew didn't know was that Sully had fallen asleep while thinking of the first time he and Dr. Mike had shared his red poncho at Black Kettle's camp. When he was awoken as Matthew and Cloud Dancing entered the teepee, his first thought had been of Dr. Mike asleep in his arms. It was only when he saw Catherine's blonde hair that he realized it was not the woman he loved nestled next to him.

Even worse than Matthew's anger and indignation were Sully's own feelings of loathing directed toward himself. How could he have forgotten his promise to accompany Dr. Mike to check on Mrs. Galloway? Was it because he was so used to coming and going as he pleased? It surely had nothing to do with Catherine. She was just someone who needed his help…who had suffered horribly and needed a friend. Cloud Dancing and Snowbird had tried to caution him about Catherine's growing feelings for him, but he had laughed it off even though she had kissed him in the clinic recovery room just the day before. Had Dr. Mike seen something in Catherine's behavior that would cause her to worry? He thought back to his last night in the homestead before he and Catherine had left for the reservation the following morning. Dr. Mike had seemed quieter than normal, and even Brian kept giving him hurtful looks. Sully knew his explanation about kissing and fishing had not allayed Brian's fears. Honestly, Sully had been surprised by the kiss, and it was over almost before it began. Maybe he shouldn't have agreed to stay with Catherine at the homestead-it had probably given her the wrong idea. Surely, she knew that he and Dr. Mike were courting. His pallet by the fire was in plain sight of Dr. Mike, and it gave him the opportunity to study the beautiful woman he loved as she slept. How he had lain there by the fire and wished he could join his heartsong in her narrow bed by the door. With her proper Boston upbringing, she would have been horrified and embarrassed by his lustful musings. He wondered if she knew that before he'd left that morning he had knelt by her bed, pushed a lone tendril of hair from her face, and placed a soft kiss on her lips.

Still, his thoughts kept coming back to why he hadn't gone with Dr. Mike on that Wednesday morning. All of this could have been prevented if he had just remembered his promise. He had no answer for the agonizing question. There had been fleeting thoughts while he was at the Cheyenne village of something he needed to do, but as he hunted deer with the braves, threw tomahawks, or indulged in a myriad of other activities with his adopted family, his promise had remained forgotten, locked somewhere in the recesses of his mind. Now his heartsong was paying an unimaginable price for his failure.

As if she could hear Sully's questions, Michaela slowly opened her bi-colored eyes and looked at the man she loved with all her heart. "Sully?" She whispered in a weak, breathy tone. "Sully?"

He jerked from his morose thoughts and exclaimed, "Michaela! You're awake!" Just as the joy in his voice resonated throughout the room, she gasped for air and started coughing. She reached her small hand toward her chest as the pain of the cough seemed to explode throughout her lungs. As the cough deepened and her body was wracked by shivering, the pain in her hip seemed to throb with renewed intensity.

"Michaela, lie still. Let me get Colleen." He pushed himself out of the rocking chair as if to leave her side.

"No, Sully. Tell me what happened. I can't…can't… The last thing I remember was leaving the Galloway homestead." The more she talked, the more labored her breathing became, and Sully knew he had to answer her questions in such a way as to not further excite her.

"You were injured, and you fell from Bear into the creek, Michaela. But Colleen took care of ya, an' you're gonna be fine. Ya hear? You're gonna to be fine." He sat back down in the chair and reached for hand.

"I'm so sorry I wasn't there and that I didn't go with ya to see Mrs. Galloway. I know I promised and I failed ya, Michaela. Can ya ever forgive me?" Sully couldn't seem to keep a hint of desperation from creeping into his voice.

With her breathing becoming more labored, she uttered the one word, the one question for which he had no explanation. "Catherine?"

He took a deep breath before answering because he knew he would need to choose his words carefully. What he was about to say could determine if she would ever forgive him.

"Michaela, listen to me. There ain't nothin' goin' on with me and Catherine. Never has been. Never will be. I just feel sorry about what she's been through. You're the only woman I love…the only woman I'll ever love. Ya hear?"

As he spoke, he could feel a lump rising in his throat and tears filling his eyes. She had to believe him. "I didn't realize I was hurtin' ya, an' I'm so sorry I caused ya pain. I'd rather die than do that."

She pulled her hand from his grasp and tried to turn her head away from him. "You kissed her though. Brian told me. How could you, Sully? How could you hurt me that way?" It was as if saying the words depleted what little breath she had left, and her eyes slowly closed.

Sully, reeling from the hurt and the accusations, grabbed at her hand again and cried out. "No! I swear, Michaela. I didn't kiss her. She kissed me, an' it don't mean nothin' to me. You're the only one I wanna be with."

Wolf, hearing the pain in his friend's voice, leapt from the warm rug by the fire and trotted to the side of the small bed. He whined and attempted to nudge his nose against Sully's arm but was pushed away as he remained focused on the conversation between himself and his heartsong.

"Whadda I have to do to prove it to ya? I love only you. Sure, I'm fond of Catherine, and I enjoyed spending time with her. But I don't love her. I ain't ever loved anybody like I love you. Not even Abagail. You gotta believe me!"

She seemed to struggle as she rushed to get the words out…words that would cut to his very soul…that would destroy him. "You hurt me. I've never trusted anyone the way I trusted you. Go away, Sully. Leave me alone. I can't be with you right now." It was as if the little strength she had left was gone. She pulled her hand from his, looked away from him, and closed her eyes. Her breathing was so shallow it was as if she were lifeless.

Sully, stunned, stood and wiped the tears welling up in his blue eyes, motioned for Wolf to follow him, and turned toward the door of the cabin…

* * *

Miles away from the homestead Cloud Dancing slowly turned toward Snowbird. "Spirits have spoken. My younger brother has lost his will to live."

"What about Dr. Mike, husband?"

"She too is lost. For like the hawks that mate for life…they cannot be separated. For without each other they are doomed to be alone, doomed to certain death…


	10. Chapter 10

**CHAPTER 10**

As Sully walked out the homestead door, he looked back at Michaela as if to convince himself of what she had just said to him. He had never felt agonizing pain like he was experiencing now…not when his mother died, not when Abagail died. He might as well be dead, too. He wished he was dead. His only thought was to get as far away from the pain as possible…to get away from Michaela, his heartsong…the woman who had just sent him away.

As he approached the side door of the barn, his intention was to mount his horse and escape before he broke down completely or before the children should find him in total despair. He was not one to cry, but now the tears escaped from his sad blue eyes, trailing down his craggy face and through his scraggly beard. He ignored them even as they dripped off the edge of his jaw. He could feel his breath catching in his throat, and he felt as if he were choking.

Just as he led the Cheyenne pony from the stall, the barn door opened fully, and Sully raised his head to once again look into Matthew's angry face.

"So you're just leavin' after all?" he tersely asked as he glared at Sully.

"Matthew, ya don't understand. Dr. Mike has told me to go. She don't wanna be with me."

'So you're givin' up on her? On us? How do ya think Brian and Colleen are gonna feel when they hear you're gone? Seems to me, Sully, you're good at leavin'. It's the stayin' you have trouble with!"

"What's that supposed to mean, Matthew? I can't stay where I'm not wanted! Don't you understand? She don't love me. She told me to leave."

"All I know is ya have a history of running. Ya ran when your ma died, ya ran when Abagail and the baby died, and now you're leaving Dr. Mike 'cause you messed up. You just like to come and go as ya please and to hell with those left behind! Ain't that right, Sully?"

He draped the reins over his horse's neck as he stalled for a response to the questions being thrown at him. Finally, he looked across the dimly lit barn and stared at the much younger man.

"Matthew. Believe what ya want. I'm tellin' ya the only reason I'm leavin is 'cause Dr. Mike has asked me to go. There is no other place on this earth I'd rather be than with her and you kids. But I have to honor her wishes."

"I don't believe you, Sully. I've seen the way she looks at you. She don't really want you to go. What's the real reason you're leavin'?"

Sully turned to lead the horse out the open barn door but paused when Matthew asked his final, pointed question.

"Is this about Catherine? I know there was more to you an' her than you let on."

"There was nothin' between me and Catherine!" Trying not to yell in frustration, he explained. "I felt sorry about what she had gone through. That's all. There would never have been anything between us even if I didn't love Dr. Mike. Sure, I enjoyed spending time with her. Sure, I'm fond of her. But she ain't the woman I love! I tried to tell your ma that, but she don't understand, especially the part about Catherine kissin' me."

Matthew jerked back as if he had been hit. "What the hell are ya talkin' about... kissin' Catherine?" He yelled and clinched his hands into fists. "No wonder then she told ya to get out. I don't blame her. How could you betray her like that, Sully?"

"I didn't kiss Catherine! She kissed me. It was over before I knew it, and it meant nothin' to me. Nothin' at all. Unfortunately, Brian saw it happen, and he told his ma before I could explain-"

He interrupted, "Brian saw you an' Catherine? No wonder he's been so outta sorts the last couple of days. How could you be so stupid?"

"Look, Matthew, I know you're angry with me right now, but you've gotta take care of everybody. They need ya, especially Dr. Mike. She needs ya to be strong. She don't want me around, and I don't know if she'll ever change her mind. I can't stay here and not be with her…not be with you kids. It hurts too much to know I messed up things even though I didn't mean to." He seemed to choke out the words.

Matthew nodded his head and held the door open. "Where ya goin, Sully? To the reservation?"

"No. I can't go there. I need to be by myself for a while. Maybe I'll ride up toward the Tongue River Valley. Toward the Northern Cheyenne encampment. I don't know."

"I gotta ask somethin'. You ain't planning on runnin' off with Catherine are ya?"

"No! I ain't goin' anywhere near Catherine. Besides, Cloud Dancing will see that she gets on the next stage so she can go be with her family in Baltimore. That's the best thing for her."

As Sully turned to mount his horse, he felt a hand reach out to touch him. When he turned to look back, Matthew extended out his own hand as if to shake hands with him. Instead, the two men hugged briefly. He could see the tears in Sully's eyes. His tears mirrored his own.

As he rode away, he looked toward the window of the homestead and chokingly muttered to Matthew, "Take care of her."

Matthew, hearing the agonizing plea, nodded. "I will. I promise..."

* * *

It had been six days since Sully had ridden out from the homestead. Dr. Mike drifted in and out of consciousness, and the fever from the pneumonia seemed to be sapping her will to live. The pain in her hip was excruciating, and Colleen tried to sooth her with quinine and willow bark tea. Finally, in frustration and mounting concern, Matthew rode into town and brought Jake Slicker to the homestead. That was a waste of time so a telegram was dispatched to Denver in hopes a doctor could travel by stagecoach to examine and treat her. Colleen was running out of ideas, and she was exhausted. Her limited medical knowledge made caring for her patient even more difficult. Upon hearing of Dr. Mike's illness, Grace and Dorothy came regularly to the homestead to relieve Colleen and help prepare meals. It was as if the injured woman was slowly wasting away in front of her children and her friends.

Brian and Colleen were angry and puzzled over Sully's departure. Even though Matthew tried to explain the reason for him leaving, the children still felt abandoned by him. Dr. Mike would periodically call out Sully's name in her delirium. Colleen had even found her trying to get out of bed as if to search for him. Matthew wondered if she could even recall her conversation with Sully and whether she would remember she had asked him to go.

Finally, the doctor arrived by stagecoach from Denver. It was that same day Catherine boarded the return stage and left Colorado Springs for good.

Dr. Bernard was a kind, grandfatherly man who attempted to reassure the children. However, he could see that the young woman doctor was gravely ill. He immediately increased the quinine and had Colleen drape a sheet over the bed so that trapped steam from pots of boiling water could ease his patient's breathing difficulties. Finally, he made two small incisions and drained the fluid from her lungs. This was a risky procedure, especially since his patient was so weak. However, her labored breathing, fever, and coughing were taking a toll, and the good doctor feared she might die otherwise.

The wound on her hip was another problem. Although the incision was healing and there were no lingering signs of infection, Dr. Bernard explained to the children that he suspected the bullet has caused part of the ilium bone to fracture, and a fragment was pressing on the nerve endings and causing the excruciating pain. Colleen described how she had felt a jagged edge when she had probed for the bullet. The doctor, impressed with the girl's knowledge and expertise, was even more convinced that this was the cause of the continuing pain. Unfortunately, Dr. Mike was too weak and ill to survive surgery so Dr. Bernard promised to come back in about a month and do the surgical repair at the clinic. Before leaving, he left strict instructions about his patient's care. Two of the most important directives were that she had to rest and she had to start eating.

* * *

It had been five weeks since Sully had left. Dr. Mike could briefly sit up in bed and drink tea or sip hot soup. She had not mentioned Sully's or Catherine's names nor asked any questions about their whereabouts. The children, by unspoken agreement, kept their thoughts to themselves even though they could see the heartache and despair in their ma's eyes. Dr. Bernard would be back in ten days to operate on his patient, if she was physically able and it looked like the surgery could be done safely.

Myra and Horace, Grace and Robert E., Dorothy, and Mr. Bray had all visited the slowly recovering patient. Even Hank, using the pretext of searching for a non-paying customer, had stopped by the cabin. None had mentioned Sully, and to Matthew's knowledge no one had seen or heard from him. Even Cloud Dancing, who had secretly appeared to visit Dr. Mike, silently shook his head negatively at Matthew's unspoken question.

Finally, Dr. Bernard returned, and Matthew and Colleen, with the help of Grace and Robert E., carefully moved Dr. Mike by wagon from the homestead to the clinic in town. It was the first time she had been out of bed in over a month.

* * *

Cloud Dancing sat cross-legged in the sweat lodge and chanted as he waited for Spirits to answer his repeated prayers. There had been no word from his younger brother in many moons. Spirits had told him of Medicine Woman's slow physical recovery but had warned of a black cloud that blanketed her heart.

As he breathed in the herb-saturated steam, he could see a vision of his brother and his wolf by a lone campfire. His shoulders were slumped, his eyes sunken into his face, and his heart and mind were troubled. It was as if he could hear the grieving man's thoughts.

_Michaela. Michaela? You gotta know how much I love ya. How much I miss ya. Please, you have to be alright. I can't live in this world without knowin' you're in it. I need to be with you because I love you so much. I'm so sorry, my heartsong. I didn't know it was possible to love someone this much._

The litany of Sully's disjointed thoughts seemed to reverberate through Cloud Dancing's mind as he continued to pray to the Spirits.

Then, as the capricious Spirits changed course once again, the lone Cheyenne Medicine Man saw his grieving brother rise from the campfire. He then saw him kick dirt over the flames, call to his trusted wolf companion, and swing his lean body up onto the back of his horse.

Cloud Dancing smiled. His brother was coming home. Soon.


	11. Chapter 11

**CHAPTER 11**

Although Brian and Colleen had returned to school and Matthew was back working at the ranch, life was far from normal. Dr. Bernard, with the assistance of Colleen, had operated on Dr. Mike's hip to remove the bone fragments. Even though the surgery had gone well, the damage to her hip was more extensive than originally thought. The good doctor feared his patient would be left with a permanent limp and ongoing pain and discomfort. She still tired easily and had lost far too much weight for Dr. Bernard's liking. He knew his fellow physicians often made the worst patients.

"Dr. Quinn. You have got to start eating. How do you expect to help your patients if you aren't willing to take care of yourself?"

"I am eating, Dr. Bernard. Please don't tell me how to treat myself. After all, I have been known to say the same things to my own patients." It was the first time he had seen a hint of fire in her eyes.

"Well, Dr. Quinn, I am sure you get just as frustrated when your patients ignore your advice as I do."

Dr. Mike looked up at her physician and smiled. "Point taken, Doctor."

He grinned at his younger colleague whom he had come to think of as a daughter. Peering down at her over his wire-rimmed glasses, he again cautioned her to rest, eat three meals a day, and avoid standing on her injured hip as much as possible.

"I will be back in Colorado Springs in another month. I will expect you to have put on at least ten pounds and be able to walk across the room without gasping for breath and having to hold onto the furniture. Do you understand, young lady?"

Dr. Mike just grinned and smartly saluted as he picked up his medical bag and turned to leave the clinic. Seeing her impertinent salute, Dr. Bernard smiled back and playfully wagged his finger at her.

* * *

The doctor had no more closed the door to the clinic recovery room than Michaela slid back down into the bed, turned her head, and closed her eyes. Tears trickled down her wan face and splashed onto the linen of the pillowcase. There were so few times that she was ever alone, and that made it more difficult to hide her melancholia from the children and her friends. She profoundly missed Sully. Her heart ached for him, and she longed to feel his arms around her and to have him hold her small hand in his own larger callused one. No one had even mentioned him by name. It was as if he had just disappeared into the night. However, she knew that his absence was partly the result of her words…of her jealousy toward Catherine…of her knowing he had kissed another woman. She couldn't help but feel that Sully had broken his promise…his promise to love her.

Several weeks earlier, Dr. Mike had overheard Dorothy and Grace talking as they sat by her bedside. Cloud Dancing had brought Catherine to town so that she could catch the stage to St. Louis. They had thought she was asleep, but when Catherine's name was mentioned, she surreptitiously listened in on the conversation. The beautiful Indian captive had finally gone to Baltimore to live with her grandmother. Had Sully traveled to Baltimore to be with her? No one in town seemed to know anything of his whereabouts. If they had seen him, they surely weren't telling. The question seemed to resonate through her mind, and no easy answer was forthcoming. She was reluctant to even voice her fears though she suspected Matthew might be able to provide some of the answers her heart so desperately sought. Where was Sully?

Dr. Bernard returned to Colorado Springs on two separate occasions to check on his patient. Finally, he was satisfied enough with her recovery to let her return to work part-time. Dr. Mike, though not a model patient, had gained a little weight, and her breathing was much improved. The hip surgery, unfortunately, had not relieved the pain, and she still had a decided limp. Only time would tell if there were to be any further improvement in his patient's halting gait.

* * *

Sully, still reeling from the loss of his beloved heartsong, slipped into Colorado Springs as dusk gave way to the darkest of night. He had been gone for over five months.

As he stood in the shadows of the alleyway between the clinic and the telegraph office, he could see the flickering light from oil lamps through the examining room windows. The white ruffled curtains blocked his view of the room's occupants. All was quiet except for an occasional loud voice from the doorway of the saloon and the constant bark of Robert E.'s old hound dog.

He had to see Michaela. He had to make sure that she was all right. She was alive, of that he was sure. His heart would have stopped beating had hers done the same.

Suddenly, a buckboard wagon came rolling down the dusty street from the direction of Loren's store. As it pulled to a stop in front of the clinic, Sully realized Matthew was the driver. As he set the brake against the wagon wheels and jumped from the seat, the door to the clinic was thrust open. Brian came rushing through the entryway and plowed straight into Matthew's larger frame.

"Hey, careful, little brother! Where's Dr. Mike and Colleen?"

"They're inside, and Colleen is helpin' Ma get her coat on."

"Okay then. I'll jus' see if they need any help."

As Matthew and Brian turned to go up the single wooden step onto the clinic porch, the light from the oil lamps were suddenly snuffed, and Michaela and Colleen exited the clinic. Sully could still see the two women by the light emanating from the saloon. What he saw left him breathless.

Michaela, with her hand clasped firmly on a cane for support, shuffled slowly toward the wagon. Colleen, who carried the black leather medical bag, supported her ma by holding her under her upper arm. Matthew, who stood to the side, held out his arms to grasp her waist and lift her up and into the buckboard's seat. After she was settled, Colleen draped a blanket over Michaela's legs. She and Brian then turned and climbed into the back of the wagon as Matthew took his seat and picked up the horse's reins. The family slowly disappeared from sight but not before Sully saw Michaela flinch in pain and rub her hip.

He continued to secretly watch the family from afar for almost a week. Robert E. had nearly caught him as he crouched by the water trough that was next to the clinic. At night, he slept on a rocky outcrop behind the homestead. Only once had he seen Michaela come outside other than when she made her twice-weekly trips to the clinic. Matthew had brought Flash from the barn and tied him to the horseshoe at the hitching post. She had carefully hobbled her away across the wooden deck planks to rub his nose and whisper into his ears.

Michaela was very thin and pale, and Sully was dismayed that the suffering that had ravaged her body and was mirrored by the distress in her eyes. No matter, she was still the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. At some point in his journey though, she had stopped being Dr. Mike, and now in his heart and mind, he called her Michaela.

It would not be long, he decided, before he would stand next to her and call her by name. _Michaela._


	12. Chapter 12

**CHAPTER 12**

The children had already left for school and work when Dr. Mike carefully traversed the uneven ground toward the barn. As she approached the door, her cane made shallow indentations in the softened earth. She was going to saddle Flash, ride out to a nearby field, and gather foxglove and dandelions for her herbal remedies. Somehow, the simple act of collecting the medicinal plants seemed to provide comfort and make her feel closer to Sully. It was something they had always done together while courting. Her heart still ached for what they had lost. Perhaps there was a plant somewhere that, when taken, could mend a broken heart…

As she rode away on Flash, a lone, buckskin-clad mountain man mounted his own horse and set off to secretly follow and safeguard his heartsong…

* * *

Dr. Mike slowly slid down the side of Flash's saddle and held on to the stirrup and saddle blanket as she tried to maintain her balance on the uneven ground. Her cane had been left in the barn, as it was too awkward to drape across the saddle and would be virtually useless in the grassy field. Reaching upwards, she gathered her canteen and leather bag as her well-mannered horse bent down to pick on the sweet grass. Fortunately, Flash had no problems with being ground tied so she dropped the reins and carefully turned toward the open meadow.

Sully, who had tied his own horse in a nearby grove of aspens, knelt at the tree line and watched as Michaela hobbled toward a rocky outcropping and eased her small frame down onto the largest of the boulders. As she bent over to pull various plants from the ground, she would stop intermittently and rub the upper side of her right hip.

Wolf, who lay next to his friend, could feel the anxiety that swiftly pervaded the mountain man's body.

Unexpectedly, Michaela disappeared from his view. Just as he arose from his crouched position, there was a shrieking cry of pain and outrage from the nearby field.

Sully took off running toward the sound. His heart was beating out of his chest as he and Wolf raced across the wide field. As he reached the granite boulder where she had been just sitting moments before, he could see her sprawled out on the soft grass. Wolf edged past his friend to stick his cold nose against the side of the fallen woman's face.

"Wolf! Quit that!" Then as if the realization of what she had just screeched out suddenly dawned on her, Dr. Mike looked up from her splayed position on the ground straight into the vivid blue eyes of the man she had prayed to see again, the man whom she thought was gone forever.

"Michaela! Are ya hurt? Here, let me help ya." Sully crouched and reached to grasp her arm by the sleeve of her multicolored blouse. Wolf continued to dance around them in excitement and bark in his wolf-like yodel.

"Su…Sully? What, what are you doing here? Where…?" It was as if her words were stuck in her throat, and she was dreaming some unattainable dream. Her questions came out in a whisper.

"Ya gotta tell me! Are ya hurt? I saw ya fall." Again, he reached as if to pull her up and into his arms.

Dr. Mike pushed his hand away and said, "Leave me alone. Let me catch my brea…" It was only then as she looked back up into his blue eyes that she could see the pain her latest words had wrought. "No, Sully. I didn't mean it like...I just need to sit here for a minute. I'm not hurt."

He rose from his squatted position and turned his back away from the sight of her as she sat staring at him with disbelief. His first thought was that she was angry he was there…or even worse, still angry over Catherine. He couldn't bear to turn and see indifference or loathing in her eyes. That would be his final undoing. Several minutes passed and no words were exchanged between them.

"Sully? Please look at me. Sully, turn around and look at me!" As he continued to stare off into the distance, she finally reached over and grabbed the leg of his pants. As if he had been singed by the heat of a burning arrow, he turned and dropped to his knees next to her. She could see that his hands trembled and his eyes were awash with unshed tears. She reached out and tentatively touched him on the arm.

As he felt her hand graze against the sleeve of his buckskin coat, he let out a soft keening wail. Her light touch was agonizing, as he wanted so badly to take her into his arms and lie with her forever amongst the flowers in the grassy field. Finally, he composed himself and raised his bent head to look into her glistening eyes. When he saw the look in her eyes, it was as if his words and thoughts poured from his lips and heart.

"Michaela! You gotta believe me. I'm sorry for hurtin' you. That's the last thing I ever wanted ta do. I'd give my own life for you any day. I've not ever loved anybody like I love you. Not Abagail. Nobody! And I never will. Please, say ya believe me! Please!"

As the words flowed from Sully's mouth, Michaela started to softly weep. She reached for her handkerchief in the side pocket of her skirt and lifted it to wipe the tears from her cheeks.

"But, but where have you been all these months? Did you go to Baltimore? Why have we not heard from you?" The haunting questions were finally asked, but Dr. Mike was still frightened by the possible answers.

"Baltimore? Why would I go there? I've been up in the Montana Territories near the Tongue River Valley. When ya told me to leave ya alone…I knew I couldn't stay and not be with ya…I just kept ridin'…ridin' until I joined up with the Northern Cheyenne. Even then I couldn't stop thinkin' about us…what we were buildin' together…what we'd lost. It got so bad I jus' had to come back. I jus' had to see to you one more time."

He stopped speaking for a moment as something she had asked registered in his mind. "Wait a minute. Catherine went back to Baltimore, or so I guess. Did you think I had gone there to find her…to be with her?" He could not keep the astonishment out of his voice as he realized what she had been thinking. She raised her tearstained face to his and swallowed before slowly nodding.

She then spoke the thoughts that had plagued her for months. "You seemed so fond of her. You even told me you were…that night when you left. I know I was very ill but I remember your telling me you enjoyed spending time with her. You and I are so different, and Catherine and you are so much alike. I…I could see how much you liked being with her, and when Brian told me about the kiss…My heart simply broke. I died inside. You hurt me, Sully."

Dropping her head into her hands, Dr. Mike sobbed out the words, "I'm not used to giving myself, and I gave myself to you. I loved you! I trusted you!"

He reached for her hands and pulled them away from her face. She nervously raised her head and looked at him through tear-filled eyes. It was as if she were searching his face for answers. Sully took a deep breath before he started to speak from the depths of his soul.

"I never planned on fallin' in love again after Abagail died. That was fine by me. I had good friends like Cloud Dancin' and Snowbird, and I was content to live out the rest of my days alone. Then you showed up in Colorado Springs, and I started feelin' things like I had never felt before. Not even with Abagail. It scared me, too…and I fought those feelin's. Sure, you and I are different. That was plain as day in Boston. But it still didn't stop me from fallin' for ya. I started seein' a future with you and the kids, and I got even more scared. But ya know what scared me more than that?" She raised questioning eyes. He looked straight into them and answered, "What scared me more was the thought of not bein' with you…of never bein' with you."

He placed his hand under her chin and leaned down to kiss her gently on the lips. She didn't pull away, and he felt the soft sigh of her breath against his skin. As if she couldn't stop herself, she reached out and placed her hands on his upper arms…holding on to him…not letting go. When he lifted his head from hers, he whispered softly, "You have to know I love you. You're my heartsong. I will love you all my days."

"Oh, Sully, I love you, too," she whispered the words he had longed to hear for so many months.

He brushed his knuckle across her face and tangled his hands in her long coppery mane before dropping his head and kissing her hungrily, forcing her lips to open as he invaded her mouth with his tongue. She gasped at the still unfamiliar sensation of his tongue mating with hers. But she didn't draw away. She continued to meet his desperate kisses with an urgency all her own. He moved his hands across her back and circled her tiny waist before pulling her further down into a recumbent position. Their lips never parted. She passionately reached under his heavy coat and gripped his shirt with her clenched fists. He could hear her soft mewl of protest as he lifted his head momentarily and looked into her desire-filled eyes. He then continued his exploration of her soft skin by gently nibbling and suckling on a sensitive spot below her ear before trailing kisses down her throat. His hands gently cupped her full breasts and brushed across her rigid nipples. As their passion intensified, he rose up and removed his coat as he reached for the tiny metal buttons at the neck of her blouse. She moaned softly as her hands inched their way under his shirt to touch the smooth muscles of his back and to pull him back down closer into her embrace. Her skirt was a tangled mess against her body and his knee pushed insistently against the material as if trying to part her thighs.

Suddenly, he rolled away from his beloved and sat up onto his knees. He raked his hands through his long hair, shoving it away from his face, and he tried to calm his aroused body as he caught his breath. He gasped out the words. "Michaela! We gotta stop. I gotta stop now, or I won't be able to!"

Realizing she thought he was rejecting her, Sully leaned down and kissed her lightly on the lips. "I love ya too much to do it this way. When we are finally together, I want it to be because we have pledged ourselves to each other forever, ya hear? As much as I want to be with ya, it's gotta be the right time…the right place."

She nodded and, although embarrassed by her wanton behavior with the man she loved, sat up and brushed loose blades of grass off her skirt as she re-buttoned her blouse. Brushing her nervous hands away, he reached out and finished doing up the buttons…just as he had done once before. This time there was not the excuse of a broken wrist or any hesitation as he touched the tiny fasteners.


	13. Chapter 13

**CHAPTER 13**

Snowbird lifted her head from a bead she was affixing onto a buckskin shirt and looked toward her husband as he sat staring into the flames of the campfire. "Cloud Dancing? What has taken your thoughts? You are much too quiet this night."

He turned to his wife of many moons and responded, "Spirits have spoken. My little brother has found his will to live again. And like the hawk that mates for life…he is no longer alone.

Snowbird smiled, and her eyes twinkled with happiness. "Medicine Woman?"

"All is well. All is right."

* * *

Dr. Mike shifted softly in the grass and grimaced as her hip protested the hardness of the ground. She stretched out her leg and placed her hand against the throbbing sensation that was a daily reminder of her incapacity. Sully saw the flicker of pain across her face and realized there was still something for which he needed her forgiveness.

"Michaela? I gotta say somethin'. I gotta apologize to ya for somethin' else…somethin' I forgot to do."

"What are you talking about? Is this something else to do with Catherine?" Dr. Mike looked lost as to what he was about to say. Surely, he wouldn't have kissed her like he just did if there were still anything he hadn't told her about Catherine. What else did he need to apologize for?

"No! This ain't got anything to do with Catherine. As far as I am concerned she don't even bear discussin' anymore. I need to tell you the truth as to why I didn't take ya to the Galloway homestead that mornin'. Michaela, I don't have an excuse for not showin' up except I plain forgot. It wasn't because of Catherine or because I didn't wanna spend time with ya. Sometimes I lose track of time or don't remember that I need to be somewhere. I guess I've just gotten so used to comin' and goin' as I please that time gets away from me." The words seemed to come faster and faster as he continued to try to explain the unexplainable.

"I know I promised I'd be there, and I broke that promise. Because of me, you nearly died, and I'll never forgive myself for that. Now you're left with pain, and I'm what caused ya to have it. I can't ever ask ya to forgive me, but ya gotta know that I'll regret hurtin' you the rest of my life, and I wanna be the one to stand by ya while your hip's mendin'...to help ya get well."

Sully, who was still crouched on his knees in front of Dr. Mike, jerked when she reached out with her hand and took his into her own. Clasping his hands with one hand, she raised the other and brushed his hair away from his face. He looked into her eyes and saw only love radiating from their depths.

"I must admit I was angry and hurt when you didn't show up at the homestead to ride with me out to see Mrs. Galloway. There was a part of me that wondered if it was because of Catherine." Sully seemed to flinch as she spoke those words, but he remained silent. "There was another part of me that worried that you had been hurt or had fallen ill."

"I am so used to your being there for me and the children I have come to expect it. Perhaps I even take it for granted. I rely on you, Sully, and that is not something I am accustomed to doing. Sometimes my stubbornness and independence get in the way, and I act before I think." He smiled at her, and the corner his mouth twitched as if he were struggling to hold back a slight grin. "That's what happened that morning. I was mad, hurt, and jealous so I acted on impulse. You had warned me the trip was too dangerous to go alone, but I didn't listen. We both made mistakes, and we've paid a high price for them. There is nothing to apologize for, and even if there were, I love you too much not to forgive you. This time apart has made me realize that life is too short for us to be mad or angry. We belong together, Sully. My heart knows that now."

He shifted from his knees and sat cross-legged on the ground next to her. He could feel the breeze from the morning sky blowing against his back, and he watched as it teased the hair on the sides of his heartsong's face. Even though the sun shone brightly, he was fearful she might be chilled so he reached over and placed his discarded coat around her shoulders.

"I gotta tell ya, Michaela. You're different from any woman I've ever known. My ma was content to let my pa make all the decisions…even to the point of leaving England to come to New York. Abagail was content be a housewife, and she never questioned or challenged me. Even Maude was afraid to stand up to Loren. You're different, and I am constantly amazed by your intelligence, your beauty, but most of all your spirit. Sometimes ya drive me crazy, but you'll never, ever bore me!" She raised her hand as if to interrupt him and keep him from speaking further.

"No. Let me finish. I've never known any other woman that has the capacity for caring for others like you do. The way ya love Brian, Colleen, and Matthew…the way ya care for your patients…even the way you have come to love the Cheyenne people. But sometimes ya let your fears get the best of you…especially when it comes to us courtin'. I want ya to know I'm scared too. It's like I said earlier. I'm scared 'cause we're so different and I might disappoint ya."

She leaned over and placed her hands on either side of his face. "Byron Sully. You don't disappoint me at all. Yes, we're different in the superficial ways…where we were born, how we were raised. But we're so much more alike than we are different. Our hearts are alike. How much we love…how much we feel. What we believe in. That's what's important. All that is left is to decide where we go from here. You once told me there were no maps but that we could find our way. Do you still think that's true?"

He reached up, took her hands from his face, and dropped kisses into both of her palms. Then he leaned over and kissed her tenderly on the lips. "I know just the place to start. We've been there before. Will ya go with me again tonight? If ya start to fall, I'll catch ya, and if the journey gets too hard, I'll carry ya. I promise…"

* * *

As the blazing sky gave way to the shadows of night and the sun slipped behind the jagged silhouette of the mountain range, an intertwined couple, wrapped snuggly in a red poncho, watched Mother Earth and Father Sky's nightly performance. A pair of graceful hawks soared above their heads and kept vigil over the lovers as they kissed and touched softly. In hushed words they spoke of their love, their family…their future…

Promises were made…and none forgotten…

Those promises…well, that's a story for another day!

**THE END**


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